Getting To Know You; Getting To Know All About You

Oh, Ladies. 

This subject has been controversial for so many of us.  Why? Because not only are we shown by society what we should potentially look like, but we are shown through our peers how we should be acting.  There was a study a few months back, maybe you remember it, it showed a woman waiting in an office with a group of people.  The experiment went like this: Girl walks into a waiting area and sees everyone stand up after they hear a beep.  After 3 beeps she starts to stand up herself.  At the time she was not aware that she was part of a social experiment to determine if she would follow the crowd or not.  And how likely was she to follow the crowd without asking questions.  Makes me wonder how many of us conform to societies cues?

Which leads me back to the main question of getting to know who you really are. 

If we stop; question ourselves and learn what makes each and every one of us unique.  You will be able to identify your most authentic self. 

A sort of map if you will of what makes you the person you are.  

I know that when I was going through some drastic changes in my life.  It was easy to feel horrible about myself.  It was easy to blame myself or someone else for everything that was happening in my life. 

It was easy to question who I really was. 

I didn't love who I was because I was looking at what others had that I didn't have.  I hated everything that I was.  All those voices crept into my head.  Questioning my own self worth.  After years of beating myself up for not "measuring up" to what I thought perfection was.  I am not just talking about physical perfection because at the time I wasn't able to move, the nerve to my one leg was shot and I was walking with a walker dragging my foot behind me.  The question was what didn't I do right?  What did I do to make this happen?  What did I fail to do; to create this mess in my life.  What could I have done differently to not make this happen.  After my back operation, I still beat myself up because I thought I wasn't enough.  

The day that saved me was the day that everything was turned upside down.  I was forced to not be the victim anymore.  I was forced to look at myself and ask what makes me happy? I was forced to fall in love with myself with all the imperfections and flaws that come with who I am.  I was forced to fight.  I was forced to push my limits.

So you see the question of who you are is not as simple as it seems.  It takes real time to learn who you really are.  It takes love and patience.  The same love and patience we have for our loved ones and friends.  It takes questioning our actions and ourselves. 

Questions to start off with: 

What is the one thing that makes you special and unique?

There is no other person on this planet quite exactly like you. For just a moment, quit focusing on what you are not, what you wish to be, or what others expect from you and find out what is the one thing you already have that makes you special. Identify your “special”-ness, acknowledge it, respect it and make it central to how you carry yourself.

What are you grateful for?

How long did you have to think to answer that question?  Remember the quote – “I cried because I had no shoes until I met a man who had no feet.”

What am I really scared of?

Is fear stopping you from achieving your goals?

What am I doing about the things that matter most in my life?

When did I last push the boundaries of my comfort zone?

These are just a few questions to start off with.  

Go on... challenge yourself to get to know yourself.  I double dog dare ya.... 

xoxoxoxo

dani 

Daniela Allen